Bistro Molines

Dashing through the trees with an army in pursuit,

And all I want’s some peace – I’d better stash this loot;

Dump amongst the vines, send some decoys out,

Pause to dine on meals fine that’s what the season’s about -

 

Jingle bells, jingle bells,

But ninjas make no noise;

This bistro serves up French repas

With great élan and poise and

Lots of wine, lots of wine

Winos everywhere

Drink one drop and you won’t stop

When chugging Hunter fare

 

Duck pate’s a dream of lushly layered love,

Choux cheese strong on cream but well-crisped by the stove;

Juicy fruits de mer ensconced in Scallop shells,

Don’t you wish that you were there amongst the muscatels -

 

Now here comes, now here comes

The canard à l’orange 

Tender, sun-kissed, citrus-soaked

Un beau merveil qu’on mange;

Goat Tagine‘s pretty mean

Though Veal‘s a tad well-done;

Sit back and relax and let your

Palate have some fun.

 

Cap off with dessert: take a glassy crème brûlée

Which snaps when you insert your spoon into its tray;

It sings with soft-sweet verve, a master’s symphony

To savour – for there’s no love back in the cacaphony of

 

Christmas time, Christmas time,

Red in tooth and claw,

Birthday boy will find no joy

In retail pimps and whores; So

Hide your children hide your wife

And hide your stash of beer,

And patience misanthropic ninjas -

We’ll take revenge next year. Hey.

Famously famous duck pate

Gruyere cheese in choux pastry

Scallops with cheese and green stuff

Best duck ever (canard a l’orange) with bacon bits and peas and a view

Goat Tagine with rice and crispy bread things and a nice plate

Veal escallopes with more bacon bits

Creme Brulee

—

Bistro Molines

Location: 749 Mount View Road, Mount View (Hunter Valley) NSW 2325

Taste-type: Contemporary French/Algerian

Price: Entrées $20-30; Mains $38-40; Desserts $15-17 (menu changes daily per seasonal produce)

How to get there: Main road, sealed road, dirt road.

Contact: 02-49909553

Tagged as: algerian, asshats, baconbits&baconbits&baconbits, best duck ever, best duck pate ever, best hunter valley restaurants, best out-in-the-wilderness restaurants, best wtf-are-we-going restaurants, bistro molines, bistro molines review, boxing day sales, canard a l'orange, chefs hats, choux cheese, confit, couscous, creme brulee, daily menu, duck for cover, duck pate, fat duck(s), ffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu, french, fresh menu, give us this day our daily bread, give us this day our daily mask, glass of whine, goat tagine, good service too, hobbes, hunter valley, just failing to reappear, new york new york, no-one else uses muscatel in poetry, no-one remembers the birthday boy, not the cuddly tiger version, off the beaten track, raita, robert molines, shopping-centre parking, stash your beer, take a break, to everyone who has fought with cursed at tried to cheat me in their pursuit of retail therapy: joyeux noel and bonne annee, to the asian mug who yelled at me in the parking lot: have a merry christmas, to the driver of the aptly-named "Trailer Trash" utility who almost sideswiped me and gave me the finger in the process: best wishes for the new year, to the fob bitch who screamed at me for blocking "her" slot: may you find peace in this festive season, tongue-twisters, top dessert chefs, veal escallopes, vive le francais, what the duck, why can french tanks drive forwards and backwards?, wine country, winos everyware